I don’t think we as Christians realize how arrogant we sound sometimes. We come across as ignorant when we push our answers at others as though they’re stupid not to believe what we believe.
Jesus didn’t treat people this way when he walked the planet, and we need to follow his lead. He knew that the most powerful way to influence someone is to genuinely respect them.
If you think about it, what causes you to be attracted to someone? Sure, their appearance can play a part, but the primary reason for being attracted to someone is because you like the way they make you feel. People love being around others who make them feel respected. In fact, that respect inspires them to want to do and be more. Respect is attractive. You move toward those you respect, and if you communicate that respect in return, they also move toward you.
Respect always needs to come first. It’s the only way anyone will ever open up to what we have to say.
So many Christians meet others with judgment and condemnation. They might mean well, thinking that they are standing strong for what they believe. But what they don’t realize is that they are slamming shut any door of opportunity that may have been open to introduce those people to a God who loves them infinitely.
None of us are perfect, so we have no right to judge anyone else. And even if we were perfect, judgment is not the way. Jesus was perfect but he didn’t guilt people who were living less-than-perfect lives. He came to end religion along with its judgemental, legalistic attitudes! When he met a woman who faced stoning for committing adultery, he turned the focus onto her accusers, saying, “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her” (John 8:7). One by one the self-righteous accusers left until only Jesus and the woman remained.
Then Jesus told the woman, “I do not condemn you either” (John 8:11, AMPC). Although Jesus knew that she had done wrong and he wasn’t saying that he condoned her behaviour, he completely accepted HER as a person, and there’s a big difference.
We as Christians need to be more like that. This is what Christianity was always meant to be.
Respect is crucial, and one of the best ways to communicate it is to listen more than you talk. When you really listen to people, care about their lives and respect their opinions and beliefs, it’s amazing what happens. That respect often opens a door for you to share your perspective—the perspective that we serve a loving God who more than anything wants a relationship with every person on the planet.
God is leading you to be the difference in this world, and he’s empowering you to do it in a way that genuinely accepts people where they are. It’s an approach that really connects with people—a Spirit Contemporary approach.
Adapted from The Spirit Contemporary Life: Unleashing the Miraculous in Your Everyday World by Leon Fontaine. Get your copy today!