God wants us to grow up, to know the whole truth and tell it in love—like Christ in everything. Ephesians 4:15 (MSG)
It is completely unrealistic to think that a picture-perfect relationship is one that never experiences disagreement. Christians are often the worst for this, believing that to be a Christian means turning a blind eye to every conflict, simply hoping and praying that it goes away. God wants us to forgive but He doesn’t tell us to avoid confrontation. Refusing to talk about problems is destructive both to you and the person you fail to confront.
Healthy relationships can only develop between two people who are willing to communicate how they feel. However, be careful to do it the right way. In healthy confrontation, the truth is spoken with love.
Jesus spoke the truth but never maliciously. In Matthew 16:23, Jesus confronted Peter when he attempted to stand in the way of Jesus’ calling, saying “Get behind Me, Satan!” His motive wasn’t to hurt Peter but help him. Peter wasn’t thinking straight and without confrontation he would have continued to go in the wrong direction.
Criticism rips people apart with the intention of bringing them down. It often turns into a debate about who’s right and who’s wrong. The truth spoken in love doesn’t attack people’s character; its motive is to strengthen the person and the relationship. Practice the ability to share how you feel while showing respect for the other person’s feelings so that you both gain a greater understanding of each other.