As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend. Proverbs 27:17 (NKJV)
Do your friends challenge you?
We’ve been on a series about wisdom for relationships we can gain from the book of Proverbs, and today’s verse challenges us to be choosy about our friends. It’s saying that just as iron sharpens iron, a sharp friend can inspire and challenge you to become sharper.
What kind of friends make you sharper? One very important thing to look for in your friendships is the willingness to speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15). You see, we all need friends who are willing to tell you the truth, even when they know it’s going to hurt.
Of course, developing a friendship like this is a two-way street. If a friend takes the chance to tell you when they think you’re making a mistake and you just get defensive, they may not do so again. But if you invite your friends to share their opinions with you and you resist the urge to just convince them to think your way, you’ll develop friendships that make you sharper.
The truth isn’t always pleasant. Just as a blade being sharpened against a file makes a really annoying sound, words that sharpen can be unpleasant. That doesn’t mean they aren’t good for you. I’m not saying that you should just put up with someone who does nothing but criticize and find fault with you. I’m talking about building friendships where both parties feel free to speak the truth in love.
Be willing to get a little vulnerable, and you’ll develop friends who sharpen you. It may be a little uncomfortable at first, but they’ll help you to grow, and they’ll challenge you because they believe in you.