Don’t bad-mouth each other, friends. It’s God’s Word, his Message, his Royal Rule, that takes a beating in that kind of talk. You’re supposed to be honoring the Message, not writing graffiti all over it.
James 4:11–12 (MSG)
Is the Christian life all about getting our behaviour right?
Let’s say that a woman’s husband one day announces he wants a divorce. The woman manages to convince him to work on their marriage for a period of two months. Although he doesn’t want to, he changes a few behaviours to appease her. He makes her breakfast every morning, but is annoyed at having to do so. He calls when he’s going to be late for dinner, and he even says, “You look nice,” when she’s heading out one evening…but his eyes stay glued to the big game on TV.
Although it’s great that the man’s behaviour has somewhat improved, he’s still far from reconciliation. Behaviour isn’t everything.
All too often we make behaviour change the main focus in our relationship with God. It’s true that God wants us to align our behaviour with what he teaches in his Word and he empowers us to do so. However, when we focus only on our behaviour, we become legalistic. We begin to think that our good behaviour earns us more favour from God. We also become judgmental of others whose behaviours don’t quite line up to the standard we think is appropriate.
We need to focus less on behaviour and more on the fact that the only reason any of us are right with God is because of Christ.
You are right with God, and have his power within you to change. Keep this as your focus, and you will stay humble, gracious, loving and forgiving of others.