Jesus turned and said to Peter, “Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the concerns of God, but merely human concerns.”
Matthew 16:23
Even the healthiest relationships experience conflict. No matter how wonderful the relationship is, you’re going to need to create boundaries and stick to them.
Even if you think you’re being the “bigger person,” it’s unhealthy to be quiet about behaviour that crosses boundaries. The silence not only hurts you, but it also enables the other person to continue destructive behaviour.
In developing healthy relationships, follow Jesus’s example. Jesus didn’t hesitate to confront those he loved. When Peter tried to talk Jesus out of fulfilling his mission, Jesus instantly confronted his behaviour.
You can stand up for yourself in a loving, respectful way. And as you’re building new relationships, look for trustworthy people who do these three basic things:
- Draw you closer to God. A trustworthy person would never come between you and God.
- Draw you closer to others. Trustworthy people don’t try to keep you from others. They realize that you need other healthy, strong relationships.
- Help you to become your best. A trustworthy person isn’t threatened by your success. They don’t need you to fail for them to feel good about themselves. They want you to become all that God created you to be.
You can set healthy boundaries in life. People will still cross them—some by accident and some on purpose. Just keep confronting them with love and respect when they do, and you will develop healthy, strong relationships.