The fear of man brings a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord shall be safe. Proverbs 29:25 (NKJV)
Do you ever rely on others for what you have no right to expect from them?
I’m not saying that you can never rely on others, or that you need to be able to handle everything on your own. You need healthy relationships to meet your relational needs, as well as some of your practical needs. But when you become overly dependent, things get out of balance. You create unhealthy relationships that are destructive to yourself and hurtful to others. This is not the kind of life God wants for you.
For example, it isn’t healthy to completely rely on the approval of your spouse or your friends to feel good about yourself or to feel happy. When you hold others responsible for your self-worth, success or happiness, you hand over an inappropriate level of control in your life. This can make you feel like a victim—helpless to change your situation and trapped in the relationship, even if it becomes abusive.
If you suspect that you might have become overly dependent on others, you need to know that you can choose a healthier, more fulfilling path. Get help from a counsellor or from someone else you can trust if you need to, but realize that it is within your power to change your life. You can learn to get your self-worth and love needs met through your relationship with Christ, and disengage from trying to get others to fulfil these needs for you.
Take the first step today. Although it will be a process, you can develop healthy relationships as you learn to access the phenomenal, overflowing, unconditional love God has for you.